Top downers when marrying Rich China Girl
Hi everyone, I'm back.
I apologize for the duration. I came back two weeks ago, and promptly ran into issues at work as well as a good old fashioned guilt trip from China Wife.
I do have stories to tell. Of a business nature. But thoughts piling up from within as well.
This blog won't really pick up speed until June, as I'm on holiday later this month. But I just can't get the issues of living with a Rich China Girl now Wife out of my mind. I'm reminded constantly by her snide comments, etc, of why "No Chinese man can stand me".
These are my thoughts:
1. "I never thought I'd have to worry about money."
Yep, China Wife has actually said this. Many, many, many a time. In particular when we were young. And I'm still speechless every time I hear it. It hurt me the first time she said it, and it hurts me now. This is what happens when one violates the rule I imposed some years ago in one of my other posts.
Do not marry an only child!!!!!! In particular a wealthy, only child. I asked it for it. Spare yourselves. There is only one way you will survive a beautiful, young, only child from a wealthy Chinese family: Be richer than she is. Or pray you find her when she's divorced and in her late thirties. (But because she's still rich right? She even then won't have a problem with suitors.)
2. "I never thought I'd have to work past 50".
In China, until very recently I believe, the official retirement age for women in China was 50. But that's old school man. My wife's mom was a high school teacher. She retired when she was 50. Oh joy, that meant she could live with us full time right from the get go!!!
Well, you are in America now babe. And you ain't gettin' jackshit if you think you are retiring at 50. We need the $. Yeah, I make good coin, but not that good. Stop trying to fucking lay a guilt trip on my ass. You think that's gonna work? Nope.
3. "I never thought your parents would be so poor."
Sorry babe, like I told you mucho times, I can't choose my parents. I'm sorry they don't have a big country house for us to raise our kids in. I'm sorry my dad isn't a bank president. I'm sorry you are ashamed of them. Shit. Maybe I should stop apologizing so much and say just shut the fuck up.
4. "I never thought I'd have to cook.
Uh...ok. Fair enough. I can cook-wait, you want Chinese food? Well then I guess I cannot cook. You don't like my cooking? Well then I guess you've talked yourself into a corner then haven't you? This isn't China babe. I ain't got no ayi to cook and clean, and do laundry, etc, etc, etc ok? And God bless Mexico but I'm not hiring a Mexican maid either. Not gonna happen. Ever. Our kids need to see us cleaning up. Doing chores. Washing dishes, folding laundry.
Did you actually think we were going to live in China? Seriously?
5. "I want a million dollar house because it sounds nice."
Indeed, China Wife now officially wants a $ million dollar house. Because well, it sounds cool. I live in a 5000 sq foot house with a pool. The value of my house has gone up...nicely since I've lived in it. And it's nearly paid off. And now she wants a million dollar house. WTF?
6. "I want a Lexus".
A honda isn't good enough, eh? Seriously? Well, as you may know from deep in the files, after two years of fighting a half hearted delay and rear guard action, I caved in, sold the honda(kept the other one), and bought a Lexus. That was in 2014. I started this blog I believe in (2012?)
Now the Lexus has 90,000 miles on it, a tad below my 2005 Odyssey, and is going to be my high school daughter's car. I just can't wait for the teasing to begin when her friends see her driving a lexus to school. And as for China Wife? Well, she will be buying another Lexus. An SUV. Hopefully 2nd hand. From her family stash I'm told.
7. "If I lived in China I'd be rich and comfortable."
She has a point. Many an old school generation from the 80's and early 90's felt even America's shit smelled fragrant. They didn't realize what was coming of course in China. The wave of foreign money, the job creation, the opportunities to sell back to America. I believe it's quite possible my wife would've been in retrospect much wealthier, much happier, and oh yeah, much more corrupt. As I've told her a hundred times, her husband would've been in jail by now, and her factory probably closed down.
It's the regret all Chinese that came here early tend to have. They tell themselves "I want my children raised here", to make themselves feel better. But more than a few return to China once their children have grown up.
I wanted to make this a good old fashioned Top Ten list. But I ran out of steam. I'm sure I'll continue to come up with new ones as "life" goes on, however.
I apologize for the duration. I came back two weeks ago, and promptly ran into issues at work as well as a good old fashioned guilt trip from China Wife.
I do have stories to tell. Of a business nature. But thoughts piling up from within as well.
This blog won't really pick up speed until June, as I'm on holiday later this month. But I just can't get the issues of living with a Rich China Girl now Wife out of my mind. I'm reminded constantly by her snide comments, etc, of why "No Chinese man can stand me".
These are my thoughts:
1. "I never thought I'd have to worry about money."
Yep, China Wife has actually said this. Many, many, many a time. In particular when we were young. And I'm still speechless every time I hear it. It hurt me the first time she said it, and it hurts me now. This is what happens when one violates the rule I imposed some years ago in one of my other posts.
Do not marry an only child!!!!!! In particular a wealthy, only child. I asked it for it. Spare yourselves. There is only one way you will survive a beautiful, young, only child from a wealthy Chinese family: Be richer than she is. Or pray you find her when she's divorced and in her late thirties. (But because she's still rich right? She even then won't have a problem with suitors.)
2. "I never thought I'd have to work past 50".
In China, until very recently I believe, the official retirement age for women in China was 50. But that's old school man. My wife's mom was a high school teacher. She retired when she was 50. Oh joy, that meant she could live with us full time right from the get go!!!
Well, you are in America now babe. And you ain't gettin' jackshit if you think you are retiring at 50. We need the $. Yeah, I make good coin, but not that good. Stop trying to fucking lay a guilt trip on my ass. You think that's gonna work? Nope.
3. "I never thought your parents would be so poor."
Sorry babe, like I told you mucho times, I can't choose my parents. I'm sorry they don't have a big country house for us to raise our kids in. I'm sorry my dad isn't a bank president. I'm sorry you are ashamed of them. Shit. Maybe I should stop apologizing so much and say just shut the fuck up.
4. "I never thought I'd have to cook.
Uh...ok. Fair enough. I can cook-wait, you want Chinese food? Well then I guess I cannot cook. You don't like my cooking? Well then I guess you've talked yourself into a corner then haven't you? This isn't China babe. I ain't got no ayi to cook and clean, and do laundry, etc, etc, etc ok? And God bless Mexico but I'm not hiring a Mexican maid either. Not gonna happen. Ever. Our kids need to see us cleaning up. Doing chores. Washing dishes, folding laundry.
Did you actually think we were going to live in China? Seriously?
5. "I want a million dollar house because it sounds nice."
Indeed, China Wife now officially wants a $ million dollar house. Because well, it sounds cool. I live in a 5000 sq foot house with a pool. The value of my house has gone up...nicely since I've lived in it. And it's nearly paid off. And now she wants a million dollar house. WTF?
6. "I want a Lexus".
A honda isn't good enough, eh? Seriously? Well, as you may know from deep in the files, after two years of fighting a half hearted delay and rear guard action, I caved in, sold the honda(kept the other one), and bought a Lexus. That was in 2014. I started this blog I believe in (2012?)
Now the Lexus has 90,000 miles on it, a tad below my 2005 Odyssey, and is going to be my high school daughter's car. I just can't wait for the teasing to begin when her friends see her driving a lexus to school. And as for China Wife? Well, she will be buying another Lexus. An SUV. Hopefully 2nd hand. From her family stash I'm told.
7. "If I lived in China I'd be rich and comfortable."
She has a point. Many an old school generation from the 80's and early 90's felt even America's shit smelled fragrant. They didn't realize what was coming of course in China. The wave of foreign money, the job creation, the opportunities to sell back to America. I believe it's quite possible my wife would've been in retrospect much wealthier, much happier, and oh yeah, much more corrupt. As I've told her a hundred times, her husband would've been in jail by now, and her factory probably closed down.
It's the regret all Chinese that came here early tend to have. They tell themselves "I want my children raised here", to make themselves feel better. But more than a few return to China once their children have grown up.
I wanted to make this a good old fashioned Top Ten list. But I ran out of steam. I'm sure I'll continue to come up with new ones as "life" goes on, however.
You should have married a rich Chinese divorcee with a kid. Would have worked out better.
ReplyDeleteAlas, let me file that under "What I wish I knew in my next life" file....
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